Poor Dad

Every time I go somewhere with 1 or none of the kids and I’m asked where the others are I get “Oh poor dad” or “aren’t you lucky”. This happens at the doctors, at kinder, at the hairdressers etc etc etc. And it gets riiiiiiiiight up my nose. No one says “oh poor you” every morning when Thommo heads off to work. And I’m pretty sure there’s no one telling him how lucky he is to be out of the house without kids.


But why is it that others perceive it as lucky? What’s lucky about having a partner that does his part of the parent? He’s not a babysitter, he’s a P A R E N T. Part of being a parent involves occassionally looking after the kids on your own. And no, you don’t get awards for that, you just don’t.

This weekend “poor” Thommo is on sole parent duty.  Early Saturday afternoon I’ll be heading to a Mum’s Only Sleepover at Big 4 Bellarine Peninsula. There will be shenanigans, alcohol, dancing and a massage Sunday morning before I head for home. And I will enjoy every minute of it knowing that the kids are being looked after by a very capable parent. Not a “poor dad” in sight.


One Response to Poor Dad

  1. ealesy says:

    Yep when I’m out with the girls I quite often get comments such as “you have your hands full?” or “wow you are a great Dad!”. It not only ticks me off but it also makes me incredibly sad that it must be uncommon for people to comment on it so regularly. It makes me sad for all those small children who must not get to spend much time with their Dads.

    But it makes me sad and angry that as a society that somehow fatherhood is somehow separated from parenthood and the responsibilities that entails.

    No one comments to my wife about how she must be a great Mum when she is solo parenting for the 9 odd hours I’m out of the house every work day, or making comments about how she has her hands full.

    When I get these comments I just smile and say “Nope not really, just being a parent, nothing special about it.”

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