Back to the birth plan drawing board

Stormy clouds have well and truly obliterated the rays of light that were shining through.

Friday we had a scan to check on the babies’ growth. They’re doing beautifully, weight guesstimates are 3lb6oz for baby A and 3lb8oz for baby B. They’re looking strong and healthy and doing everything they should be. Unfortunately, the presenting twin (the one closest to the exit, in our case baby A) is currently breech. We do still have time for him to somersault himself into a better position though.

Then Monday we had to reschedule a hospital appointment because our childcare fell through . When Thommo spoke to the midwife to let her know she told us by not attending the appointment we were putting mine and the babies’ lives in danger and that we may die. However, when she rang later on they had cancelled my obstetrician appointment for the next day and rescheduled it with the appointment we had to change to next week. So obviously our demise can’t be too imminent. She also took it upon herself to change which Dr I will be seeing, which is quite upsetting.

Thommo and I were/are quite upset, it was unnecessary scare tactics and it was concerning that the midwife would use such strategies over something relatively minor, it made us wonder what she would be like when it comes time to birth our babies. Would she stand up for what we want and what we have discussed with her or will she pull out the scare tactics for no reason again?

I spoke to the caseload team and requested a change of midwife, unfortunately today it’s been confirmed that they are too busy and my option is to either stay with the midwife we have or switch back to the general system and take whatever midwife we happen to get on the day.

It’s a big blow to our birth plans and very disappointing. Thankfully we still have our fabulous doula and my wonderful best friend to help us fight for what we want. It would have been nice to have a member of staff that was on the same page as us as well but obviously not meant to be.

Now comes the part where I have to detail as much as I can of what I want for the birth so that my team know what I want and know what we are fighting for. Sucks that gettging the birth we want requires a fight but unfortunately that’s the way the system is.

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4 Responses to Back to the birth plan drawing board

  1. Nire says:

    I’m really sorry things aren’t going as planned sweetie. You guys have fought every step of the way for these beautiful babies. I know it’s been a tough road, but you can do it, and with your determination and devotion, you will do it the way you want.

    Just keep focussing on your four bubbly boys. Don’t give up.

  2. Sazz says:

    that’s really disappointing, though not at all surprising 😉 On the other hand better you know now rather than finding out in labour. Still no chance of a mw attending you at home?

  3. helen says:

    gosh, what a terrible thing to say to you. Do you feel up to speaking to your midwife about the way you felt after she said that? I think it might help you and your relationship with her in the long run. Get it out, don’t let it fester.

    Or if you don’t feel that you can say something to her, maybe write a letter to the hospital?

    • ljma2009 says:

      Hi Helen,

      I spoke to one of the midwives who run the caseload program and they spoke to her about it being inappropriate. I did have the option of continuing with her as my midwife but under the circumstances feel better taking the chance of getting whoever is on on the day rather than going into the birth with someone we know we don’t/can’t trust. My birth support team are fantastic and know my wishes, I trust the 3 of them to advocate for me if necessary. Hopefully it’s not necessary (wishful thinking I’m sure!).

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